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snorky @ 1:17 AM #
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MMm Tough one Orazzio. It Depends.
On monday or wednesday i'd have to say Venus. Tuesday and thursday i'd go with Serena.
Friday is my day off and I save the weekends strictly for Beyonce!
 If only real life was more like my imagination I think i'd be a happier camper. And there'd be enough cheese and futons for everyone in the world!
Turns out that i've got a soft spot (or is that a hard spot) for black chicks. I'm not sure where it stems from as i've hardly interacted with any black people let alone female ones. Maybe it's that whole forbidden fruit thing? Maybe I just dig them because they aren't common in Australia?
I'd love nothing more than to have my next relationship with a black lady. Unfortunately as I mentioned, there aren't many around here. And the ones I do see are walking around with muscle clad white guys (i lack the muscle cladding). Funny thing is.. i'd be happy with almost any form of relationship right now.
Relationships with females that are more than just friends have managed to elude me for quite sometime now. It's safe to say i'm experiencing some what of an extended drought. Here is the deal. Everybody that I work with has someone. All of my friends (except for a couple) have someone. It's as if life is mocking me, showing me how it can be done while never allowing me the chance. In the same breath I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I'm sure my mother is beginning to worry. I've already been through the "I'm not fucking gay" routine with my sister. I don't want to feel sorry for myself either. It is at the source of all my depression but I refuse to let it get the better of me. I refuse to be depressed. This sometime makes things worse.
Either way, i'm told "you need to put yourself out there more". This is a tough thing to do when i'm not into the clubbing scene and most other things that would place me in a position where i'd have a hope of developing some sort of relationship. I think the closest interaction i'd get is "May I take you order please?".
Sometimes I worry that I objectify things too much but when I really thought about it, everyone does this, otherwise nobody would like anything. That's what liking/loving things is all about. You can't develop an opinion on something until you understand why you like it or dislike it. But objectification and feelings don't mix. Feelings are separate entities that help you draw metaphysical connections to the objects in your environment. The closer you relate the stronger your connections. You can't really love a toaster but you can love a pet. Truely loving another human is probably the strongest connection you will ever make.
Am I starting to talk crap again. The point. I like girls. There is lots I can do and lots I don't. I have to put myself on the market so to speak. If you are a single [insert any race] female and happen to pass a guy on the street that is wearing a flashing neon sign on his head with the words "Love Me I'm Open" alternating then stop him for a chat. He may actually be the "nice guy" every woman talks about.
p.s. The sign should be ready next week [jest].
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snorky
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| |- Friday, January 24, 2003 -| |
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orazzio @ 5:06 PM #
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Latino and Black sex
Ok so its an ambition of mine. A latino would make my favourite sexual conquest. A black girl may be equally arousing or more exotic still. It freaks me out that Id never imagined the prospect of two black sisters and two latino girls who could be sisters - AT THE SAME TIME! Sweaty, athletic, hardbodied, fighting over the right to stroke my hairy balls (ok so they arent my hairy balls). This fantasy had to come to me via televsion broadcast.How could I not have imagined it myself. Serena and Venus williams versus Ruano Pascual and Suarez! Oh the joy of tennis doubles action. Not since Anna and Martina had partnered have I been ushered so much joy. Ok so this didnt compare and I didnt watch much. But damn its good to know that sport can still provide the kind of entertainment that we are looking for.
Just out of curiosity? Venus or Serena? Personally I prefer Venus. She lives up to her name. Full bodied and full powerful she is all women. Shes got everything Beyonce Knowles has got only its angrier. She's no match for Beyonce of course. Beyonce would have that grand slam eyes shut. But Venus has legs to match. Broad, powerful they just scream rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Or perhaps thats her voice during her service game.
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orazzio
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| |- Tuesday, January 21, 2003 -| |
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orazzio @ 4:03 PM #
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Hi people,
I am still relcutant to going back to my usual despondancy on international and sociological affairs. My own affairs weigh heavy in the air upon me.
Suffice to say that I am little taken aback by Snorky's blogs. If I do get to have a wedding I am sure as hell excited by the prospect of his speech. If I dont I am least a little flattered by his words and his friendship.
Its funny. When you have a partner you are more flattered by kind words about them then yourself. I guess thats what it means to truly love someone. You care more about there place in the world then your own.
When some people get a partner they dissapear into oblivion. I have never been that way inclined until now. I take this person seriously. And with health problems ont he side my life is quickly limited. However it has been my observation that over time people drift away and then float back again. Its natural for people to grow and expand and then return to their roots as poingantly reflected in the Italian film, Cinema Paradiso. Ive noticed it with my friends and family as they get married or become careerist or travel. They dissapear and then come back again. This time in my life is a time when everybody is coming close again. It tells me how much of a vacuum Ive been living in previously.
I am someone who has always needed the affections, intimacy and deep emotional relationships of my peers. However having loved it is as if I have never lived before. They are the wallpaper in a room furnished by my one true love. The centre of your universe (as well described in a recent episode of farscape) is just that. And as you move through life it never changes. Its your guiding light. Your friends are the beautiful people that you get to travel with.
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orazzio
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| |- Monday, January 20, 2003 -| |
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snorky @ 7:22 PM #
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Orazzio to me is one of those friends that I know will still be there the day I die. He is one of those guys that reminded you of fonzie (da fonz). He had all the ladies and all the life. I never thought he'd be the one to settle down. But I knew when I first met Orazzio's 'The One' that she was different. I could actually hold an intelligent conversation with her. This is a quality I know Orazzio values. I myself value this also.
It wasn't just that though it was the fact that she was versitile and selfless. They could share things between them that regular couples would never think to talk about and enjoy things together that nobody would expect from either one of them. Except me perhaps.
The point here is that they are not bent on being different but more focused on not being the same. Diversity of thought is the key to longevity applied under any cirumstance. They both except each other for what they are and append any differences to each other as if it were second nature.
It pains me to think that this wont last. This is my proof that 'it' can happen. I can't accept that this evidence could be taken away from me. Personally I think everything will work out. Their fates are joined, they can't escape that. Not on my watch!
We have to hook up Orazzio. I'm using up some of my best speech material here. What's a best man to do?!
Allora parliamo doppo!
p.s. I got a vein (or something) in my nose cordorized (not sure how to spell it). This involves finding the said vein and then burning it with acid in order to sever it's connection and stop it from breaking again. I had always had a problem with nose bleeds and this is the method I chose to stop them altogther. It worked for my mother and sister. Hopefully it will work for me. It kind of felt like a needle being jabbed straight into your nose. Wasn't too bad. It made my eyes water a bit.. NO I WASN'T CRYING! Pain was gone after around five minutes. Yay. The End.
Places to go:
the law of the playground
For people who have bullied or been bullied to get together.
Craig Mullins
If you dig concept art, check this out.
Delusions of Grandeur
Can't remember if i've posted this before but it's a great archive of mythological figures.
Why males bear pain better
Personally I think we all deal with our physical pains in different ways, male or female. You have pain... you deal with it. More often than not you have no choice in the matter!
Go Fuck Yourself
Oh.. only if you feel so inclined. Nothing personal here people. I was the 4619342nd person to do so. Thanks Orazzio. Enjoy!
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snorky
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orazzio @ 3:34 PM #
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Fuck guys, there may not have been much blogging on lately but I have sure as hell been enjoying the site. It almost makes my words pale into insignificance.
My dissapearance has been a reluctance to share with the world some very deep seeded concerns in my life. Everything in my life hinges on one person. (yeah of course it's a women).
In the past month in particular I have been everything from pragmatic to defeatist to downright shitting my pants about losing said life hinge. Some things have just gotten really ugly. But its not like Im all sooksy about some ho that I go to the movies with and slap the ass of in shopping malls. Its the one. 'The one'. The one all the movies feature and books are written about. The one that gave birth to romance and poetry and beauty in nature. The one that turns your life upside and makes work and money and the infinate possabilities of life become irrelevent. The one that takes so much of your energy thinking about, that you miss tornados and bushfires and the collapse of civilization.
Of course after the honeymoon is over things get more complex but you cant have a door without a hinge. You have collapse. The centre of your universe doesnt change and nor would you dare wish to change it. You give your life to someone with the only requirement that they have you. And that, that alone gaurantees you a life of happiness.
As I illuded to earlier that all started crumbling. I still have fear pumping through my veins and I still walk through life like its a darkened corridor. Only one person can light up my path and my life will read like a tragedy until that person does......
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orazzio
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orazzio @ 3:18 PM #
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It might be today but if it isnt, you know you will need this one day.
The Go Fuck Yourself Home Page
The Go Fuck Yourself Home Page, a way for you to tell someone what you think of them. ... You are number
4607588 to go fuck yourself since 3/22/97. ...
http://www.amishrakefight.org/gfy/
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orazzio
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